The A Word: Akathisia

I was going to wait before posting another blog so soon. I wanted to brainstorm and research some topics further, but then I saw the video posted at the end of this post and I couldn't help but bring it to light. Before I go on, one more disclaimer: I am not against psychiatric medication, but I am for informed consent. Anyone should be able to make informed choices regarding their own health. Having said that, here I explain a devastating and terrifying feeling.

Akathisia is an all too little talked about reaction to psychiatric medication and a symptom of psychiatric medication withdrawal.

It's very hard for me to write about this. I rarely ever talk about experiencing the symptom while suffering between doses of alprazolam because it's a traumatizing thing. I call akathisia the "A word" because it is that scary, and I didn't even suffer to the extent some others have suffered.

Imagine feeling fidgety at first, suddenly you can't sit still, but it's not just that. It is an unrelenting feeling of wanting to crawl out of your skin. You want to scream. You can't concentrate or sit down long enough to watch over five minutes of a television show. You think about death constantly. You are constantly anxious... You are irritable, agitated with loved ones, exercising often makes it worse because your heart is already beating so fast it feels like you're already running. Sometimes contorting yourself in strange positions gives you temporary relief, but you have to lay completely still. You research these symptoms and find out what it is, but you don't know what to do. Sometimes it goes away, sometimes it doesn't, and there's no telling when this unbearable feeling will end. It is awful. People end their lives because of this disabling effect.

So I had to share this video today when I saw it:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfW5L5II-jY

The nonprofit mentioned in the video is called MISSD. I will most likely be donating to the organization tonight or tomorrow. How many more people have to die because they weren't warned? How many people have to feel invalidated because the general public or doctors are unaware of this horrifying feeling?

It's just a shame. A damn shame.